When I joined the local Seniors’ Centre after retirement, I met many new women and men through the local clubs and activities. This is a place for strong, vital people who want the stimulation and surprises an active life still offers to those who seek it. They are interested and interesting.
The women are feisty. I put it down to having a lifetime of succumbing to other’s needs and demands, always playing second fiddle, and denying their own requirements and desires. Now, at this time of their life, they find themselves released from all those pressures and they aren’t going to do it anymore. This is a time for them.
The men seem chilled, calm. Perhaps they, too, are tired of life’s demands on them to support, guide, lead, be the boss, the one in charge. They are glad to release the reins of power to another. This is a time for them.
Our twilight years offer us a freedom from all the duties and obligations we have had for most of our lives. Children are grown, the nest is empty; jobs are complete, retirement beckons. This is a time for us, a time for women and men to live their best lives. We still have time.
Back in September 2022, I joined a local Memoir Writers’ Club that meets weekly. The focus is on writing our life stories as an autobiography, written in chronological order. Jennifer, our group leader, wrote her own memoir during COVID isolation and felt that perhaps others would like to record their life story. She felt led to offer her experience and guide other seniors through the process.
I joined the club because I had a memoir-in-progress titled “For the Love of Food – Family Edition” and wanted the company of other writers for feedback and encouragement. I have been working on my memoir/cookbook for about a year now and am now about ½ way through it. It is unusual, not your standard memoir, but I feel led to write it in this form and am enjoying it immensely. I truly see food as a love language and I can see how food has shaped my life through five generations of my family. I am aiming to publish it for a public market. I am continuing with my book, in my own way, but I do enjoy our class and don’t mind writing on the topics suggested by Jennifer. My book has and will be taking a totally different form than what she has suggested to other club members but I have still found our class to be of value to me. The stories bring back many memories and are good writing practice.
I think our class is very special. There is definitely a desire for all of us to record our stories. I think the reasons for writing our life stories may differ and, perhaps, some may not even know why they want to write, and yet the need and desire is there. Some write because their family has requested it. Some may write truly for themselves as an assessment of their own lives. We all want to know our lives matter. We want to know we left a mark. We value our memories and want a record of them left behind. Perhaps our families are not the least bit interested in reading them at this time but, one never knows, there may come a day when they are glad to have the stories and the information and memories they contain. I know my own daughters didn’t value their old journals from school but as they aged and had children of their own, now they do. Perhaps some day our stories may be of value and interest and be read by many others as snapshots from the past.
There is no doubt that there is a close bond that has been built in our group. I keep attending and writing, even though I won’t be publishing my stories in the way suggested. I love hearing other’s stories and sharing our lives. I love story! And we all have them. We all think, “I have nothing of interest to others” but, in the end, we do. Sharing our simple memorable moments is a wonderful way to share our lives and identify with each other or learn new things. Even if we all visit Paris, we each will have a unique story to tell about it from our own perspective. There is value in that.
Thank you, Jennifer, for your gentle and encouraging guidance. You have given us an opportunity to remember our lives and share them with others. I have a new group of friends. It’s what keeps us coming.
